Cats have dominated the internet for a long time now, going all the way back to the halcyon days of lolcats and "I CAN HAS CHEEZBURGER?" Once social media took over our lives, I came to accept that within seconds of logging on, I'd glimpse happy cats, sleeping cats, working cats, and any number of other felines living their lives on my screen.
Looking at more recent times, however, dogs have made great progress towards evening the playing field. I think @CanYouPetTheDog on Twitter might have started the pushback but however it happened, I now see and hear from dog lovers just as much as cat lovers. I don't dislike cats but I grew up with a dog and I have many fond memories of our pet so I welcome the current caninaissance; if anything it's made me appreciate the pooches I meet on the streets and in the park all the more.
You don't need an emotional attachment to dogs to enjoy Dog Witch—an indie game launched on November 5th—but playing this roguelike might nudge you in that direction. Over the past couple weeks I've grown quite attached to my on-screen best friend. It's gotten to the point that I almost feel bad playing the game because all of my runs end in failure as the whims of random numbers can be cruel.
I delight in Dog Witch's straightforwardness, as each game begins with our hero already in flight on their quest to topple the Mad Master Wizard. What caused this rift? Do the protagonist and antagonist even have a pre-existing relationship, or did this magical pup come here to defend the interests of strangers? Lore-free Dog Witch does not elaborate to its own benefit; the lead character is simply named Doggie though a customization menu lets players change this.
The capricious roll of the dice decides the outcome of every turn-based battle in Dog Witch. You have six tools to choose from, each one with its own dedicated side on the cubes of chance. Wand attacks, Book powers up the Wand, Bone erects a shield, Mana builds power for a spell, Summon conjures comrades-in-arms, and Curse aims to interrupt the opposition.
From the start, Dog Witch tilts the odds in favor of the house. Most fights feature multiple foes working in tandem, often with much more health than the magical mongrel. Players benefit from taking more actions per turn driven by the number of dice in your inventory. Enemies also announce their own moves in advance, giving you time to counterprogram.
Your dog sets out with default equipment though after each victory, you get a choice of three upgrades. These include replacements for the basic dice actions or accessories that grant bonuses. Everything in your inventory has dozens of alternatives which means no two sessions will fill your pockets with the same combination of treats.
Dog Witch looks adorable with big, goofy characters on both sides of the screen. Even the Mad Master Wizard has such a dopey look on his face, I can't stay mad at him no matter how many times he slams the door shut on my runs. The background tunes also surprise with relaxed rhythms that you wouldn't expect in a fantasy setting. It's not the kind of music I normally seek out but it's certainly grown on me as I've played.
Less adorable, however, are the emotions I experience when my quest concludes not because I screw up but because the game simply deals me a bad hand. With enemies broadcasting their next attack, I always know how I should best respond. Yet if I roll and reroll all my dice and never get a single Bone, then I cannot block. If I've whittled a boss down to one health and need only deliver a finishing blow, I still need an offensive option to turn up. Those losses sting.
So yes, there are days where I boot up Dog Witch and take in 20-30 minutes of fun before screaming at my PC—but I wouldn't keep coming back if I didn't enjoy it. I also recognize that without the randomness, Dog Witch would present no challenge. For now, I look forward to discovering more upgrades and one day finding a way to muzzle that Wizard. Should I manage to win at some future date, I've already unlocked multiple hats that increase the difficulty, and the developers have pledged to add new things in the months to come.
With roguelikes and dogs very much in vogue, Dog Witch is an easy title to recommend. Your aims to defeat the Wizard live and die at Lady Luck's vagaries but—as fans of the genre know all too well—there's always time for one more attempt. Also, don't fret if your little pup falls in battle because there's a sure-fire sign they're actually A-OK: You can always click the left stick to hear them bark.
Dog Witch is available on Steam. A pre-release review code was provided by the publisher.